mess

and I could say that I’m afraid and angry. Angry at myself for the words I can’t tell you while you’re just in the next room.
I don’t understand and I don’t think I’m capable of anything anymore. For once, admittedly I am in a slump. But that’s not what you need. And I can’t tell you because my slump  doesn’t matter and it shouldn’t. I wouldn’t, and couldn’t.
My problems are of the least.
Everyone is suffering, why you? Why are you special? You’re not, Hayley. You’re not. How could you forget.

and I’m sorry, I know I’m difficult, and I’m starting to see it, maybe you do deserve better.
I might not be able to give you what you need, what you should have, the support the drive the love the attention. I’m failing as myself, and you don’t need to drown with me or take your time helping or understanding all of this mess.

Because at the end of the day, None of me should matter and has never mattered. So why now?
Put everything back hayley

&& I lost a good figure today, I’ll miss you. rip