Wednesday, January 29, 2014
with January drawing to a end, i honestly don't feel like i'm in a new year. Maybe it's true, i'm still stuck in the past, the feelings and the way i was in the past year. Frankly, i see no longer see the difference in it being a new year or not. Resolutions all pins down to how determined you are in the end. I often see myself failing in fulfilling any resolutions, so i decided not to have them anymore this year. I'm so lazy and i hate myself for it. ugh. But what i have learnt during the last few months of last year. I don't live for anyone but myself. My perspectives of things, what's right or wrong morally for majority of the people, might not be for me. I used to go with the flow~ like literally everything. Change. It scares me yet i'm feeling satisfied somewhat from what i used to be and what I've become (for now). Nothing i'm proud of but it's like i feel like i should do what i wish to do because i'll only be young once. SO MUCH FOR NOT SAYING YOLO but meaning the same.
Holding onto the same feelings and wanting to feel different. How contradictory my thoughts and emotions work.
I always have second thoughts about posting personal things on this page of mine, but i guess i can't just have one side of myself written here. to the good and bad.